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THE STATE OF OUR UNION: Opinionated MAMA's Perspective on "Keeping It Together"

When the honeymoon is over and the day-to-day grind of real life begins, it takes a lot of hard work to create a healthy, happy...more perfect...union. Whether we are talking about the state of our country or the state of our own marriage and family, the message is the same. We need to take time to evaluate what is working, what isn’t and figure out how to adjust accordingly. If we are in a dysfunctional relationship it is hard to deal with any problems, big or small. Never mind an economic crisis, healthcare crisis,...

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The holidays are here!  In the spirit of massive excess that marks our American Christmas celebrations, I offer you a sort of montage of Christmas books this month.  

I thought I’d try to be a little bit seasonal—thematic if you will, for this month, this oh, so joyous month of glad tidings and joy to the world and all that.  

I really, really wish I felt that way.  I really wish that I could just chill out and enjoy the season—but honestly, tell me one thing about it that is truly enjoyable?  Stress free?  No strings?  No extended family?  No arguments?  Honest to God—I can’t think of a single thing, how about that?  So I’m a Scrooge, I guess, a Grinch even!  Believe me—I would love it if my heart would grow 2 sizes today or on Christmas—maybe my boobs would look bigger.  

Even the damned advent calendar that cost like $1.99...

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This book is an absolute classic.  It was much loved by me as a child and my own kids feel the same way.  It contains stories, poems and songs and the last story is Clement C. Moore’s The Night Before Christmas which of course, we always save until Christmas Eve!

The illustrations are vintage which for me, somehow, is a more palatable way to visualize Christmas.  The book has a sort of Norman Rockwell-esque depiction of the season—something we can all strive for, I guess!  

Some of the stories are a couple pages and some are longer.  But the good thing is that nestled among the stories are really short poems and songs that can be read on those nights when everyone is already almost asleep or about to lose their marbles because of too much fudge or just general holiday excitement!  

For those of us who do at least give a nod to the...

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Most of my friends are long time friends—20-30 years or so.  I have a few newish friendships—formed post kids—consequently, with some of these friends, I don’t know their histories yet; I don’t know their “people.”

A while back, I was sitting at my daughter’s soccer game with one of these newer friends and her mother.  The grandma was drinking a Coke out of a can and it sounded like a rattle to me. 

I said, “Hey, Patti, why does your mom’s Coke sound like a rattle?”  She said, “It’s got peanuts in it.  She won’t drink it any other way.  It’s a Southern thing.”  “Gross, “ I thought.  But hey…a Southern thing…that sounds interesting…since then, I’ve gotten herto dish quite a bit about her southern roots. ( I grew up about 10 miles from where I live now and have never lived outside the state of California, so I have very few...

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In my extended family, I have by default become the unofficial Thanksgiving hostess.   No one else wants to deal with the mess, or the hassle, so I have taken over.  Ever since my first daughter was born and I went into my first post-partum “mole” period, I’ve been hosting—that baby is 10 now and her little sister is nearly 8!  And, my husband would just as soon stay home for everything, so it works out for him as well.  So, altogether, we have around 12-15 adults, depending on great grandparents and how many strays we’ve brought in and 11 kids—10 of whom are under 7 –that number soon to grow as twins are on the way for my youngest sister—so, 13 at the kids table next year.

 It is by far my favorite holiday.  I love to cook. I love team cooking and cooking all day.  I love to create original and homemade/garden plucked...

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An oldie but a goodie!

In my former-pre-kids life, I was a Kindergarten teacher, and as Halloween approached every year, I used two thematic units in my “curriculum.”  The first was “Bats and Bones” and the second was “Spiders!”  The week of Halloween itself was usually a total loss anyway, so I was less ambitious then and didn’t attempt any radical science lessons etc.

Anyway, I know more about fruit bats and arachnids than your average stay at home mom!  One of our favorite story time books during Spiders week was, “Be Nice to Spiders” a book first published the year I was born—1967.

“Be Nice to Spiders” tells the simple story of Billy and his pet spider, Helen, whom he must leave at the zoo due to regulations in his new apartment in the city.  Helen is a godsend for the fly-addled and miserable animals until the zookeeper...

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This memoir received mixed reviews, but enough of the critics had enough good things to say that I read it despite an inherent shudder when I realized an actress had written it.  And in saying that I’m absolutely not saying actresses can’t write; Carrie Fisher has written some of my all time favorite books…no, I just think sometimes people shouldn’t try to do it ALL! Don’t be so greedy!  I mean does Bruce Willis really need to be in a band too?  Does Kevin Costner?  They are good actors making good money…do we have to go see their concerts too?  Is Mandy Moore an actress or a singer?  Focus, people! 

But there was that sort-of tabloidy element with this memoir even though I have never even seen a single episode of “Law and Order: CSI” and had never heard of Isabel Gillies before I saw the reviews.  But she is really good looking and...

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